We were sitting around the house on Sunday evening wondering what to do with ourselves after an early supper. By early supper, I mean that we had cooked, eaten and cleaned up before 5. It turns out that the older we get, the older we get. There were a number of theoretical activities proposed, but the winner was the one that had air conditioning and popcorn in generous portions.
I'm sure you've all played the next game more than once with your significant other.
There were only two things in the movie that made me groan.
First: After a long day/week of being chased, kidnapped and shot at, you would think that Cameron Diaz would learn the lesson of doing whatever the hell Tom Cruise tells you to do. If she doesn't stop when he says stop, she gets shot at. I'm not disparaging anyone here, I'm just saying that my three year old niece learns lessons faster than Cameron Diaz. Yes, there's a lot going on with all the shooting and running, so maybe her mind was on other things.
Then there's this one scene where nothing is going on and he says "stay here" and she doesn't bloody stay here. We looked at each other in the dark of the theatre and said "really?" It was a pretty trivial point, and it could have been done a half dozen different ways, and in the end it didn't really amount to much, but you'll know the scene when you get to it. And I bet you'll think the same thing.
Second: Tom Cruise's character is named Roy Miller. SPOILER ALERT: that's not his real name. Not really a spoiler, he's a frigging spy. If you thought he was going to use his real name, then you are a dummy. Yes, I wrote dummy. Because I haven't written it in a long time but I've used it twice today already and it feels kind of good. Try it. So Roy's real name is Something Knight. Yep, his real last name is Knight, hence the Knight of Knight and Day.
Cameron Diaz's character, as you probably guessed, is June Havens. June Havens. And that's why it's called Knight and Havens.
You know me. You know that's the kind of thing I'll get hung up on at a movie. Guess what her sister's name is. April. But it's not called Knight and Months, because that would be a dumb name, dummy.
Anyway.
Good flick. Try not to get caught up in the end, which doesn't make a lot of sense, but let it slide and you'll feel better about the whole thing. Kind of like when you get cut really badly and you're bleeding everywhere and everyone is excited and then later when you get the stitches and the bandage taken off and all there is is a tiny scar that totally isn't representative of the gigantic wound you suffered earlier but you at least have that great story to tell.
Yeah, just like that.
I'm sure you've all played the next game more than once with your significant other.
- The movie has to be interesting to us both - scratch Jonah Hex
- It has to be one that we feel will not lower our otherwise low standards further - scratch Killers
- It has to be one that we feel should have a true big screen experience - scratch Get Him to the Greek and Grown Ups
- It has to be an early show because one of us has to work the next day - scratch Toy Story 3, The A-Team, and The Karate Kid
- It has to be a "passes accepted" movie so we don't end up having to take out that second mortgage - Knight and Day it is
- (Note, no "vampire" movies were ever in consideration during the making of this list.)
There were only two things in the movie that made me groan.
First: After a long day/week of being chased, kidnapped and shot at, you would think that Cameron Diaz would learn the lesson of doing whatever the hell Tom Cruise tells you to do. If she doesn't stop when he says stop, she gets shot at. I'm not disparaging anyone here, I'm just saying that my three year old niece learns lessons faster than Cameron Diaz. Yes, there's a lot going on with all the shooting and running, so maybe her mind was on other things.
Then there's this one scene where nothing is going on and he says "stay here" and she doesn't bloody stay here. We looked at each other in the dark of the theatre and said "really?" It was a pretty trivial point, and it could have been done a half dozen different ways, and in the end it didn't really amount to much, but you'll know the scene when you get to it. And I bet you'll think the same thing.
Second: Tom Cruise's character is named Roy Miller. SPOILER ALERT: that's not his real name. Not really a spoiler, he's a frigging spy. If you thought he was going to use his real name, then you are a dummy. Yes, I wrote dummy. Because I haven't written it in a long time but I've used it twice today already and it feels kind of good. Try it. So Roy's real name is Something Knight. Yep, his real last name is Knight, hence the Knight of Knight and Day.
Cameron Diaz's character, as you probably guessed, is June Havens. June Havens. And that's why it's called Knight and Havens.
You know me. You know that's the kind of thing I'll get hung up on at a movie. Guess what her sister's name is. April. But it's not called Knight and Months, because that would be a dumb name, dummy.
Anyway.
Good flick. Try not to get caught up in the end, which doesn't make a lot of sense, but let it slide and you'll feel better about the whole thing. Kind of like when you get cut really badly and you're bleeding everywhere and everyone is excited and then later when you get the stitches and the bandage taken off and all there is is a tiny scar that totally isn't representative of the gigantic wound you suffered earlier but you at least have that great story to tell.
Yeah, just like that.
I love that you nixed Karate Kid because it started to late!
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